Title: Stunned Started and finished: May 17, 1999 Summary: Fill in the blank (major spoilers) for Biogenesis. A lot can happen during commercials :) Category: S A MRS implied Rating: PG Disclaimer: Dear Chris: We could have done without the strip tease and I really wish you'd kept the part where Mulder told Diana to 'buzz off', which earned him a stun gun kiss , but over all, at least you gave us fodder for the summer. I would never get money for this, then it would be work. You keep the 16 hours days and the profits, I'll keep watching :) No infringement intended. Archives: Yes Notes: Thanks, Susan, Jenniferanne and Kathy, as always. This is just one possibility. There are others. Go write them :) Stunned by Vickie Moseley vmoseley@fgi.net "He's violent." The words rang in her ears. Scully had seen Mulder violent, on more occasions than she cared to remember. He'd been violent with her over the phone when he'd awakened from a drugged stupor and fever after his father had been murdered. He'd been violent enough to pull the trigger on Alex Krycek later that same day. He'd been violent when he'd slugged John Roche in an interrogation room after the serial killer had played mind games with him for an hour. He'd later shot Roche in an abandoned bus with a seven year old girl not more than three feet away. He'd been violent when he'd pulled the trigger that put a bullet in Robert Modell's head and saved her life. And in each of those times, he'd spent the next hours or days in a self appointed hell of guilt and self recrimination. Except for the three days he'd spent in a drug induced coma that she'd provided. She stood outside the door to his room. There was a small glass window reinforced with wire. She could see him pacing like a caged tiger. Every third or fourth circuit he would put his hands to his head, pulling at his hair in an effort to stop the pain, the noise in his mind. She could see where he'd already pulled out a fair amount of strands. If she didn't get him calmed down, he'd be bald in spots. The orderly was talking and she was dividing her attention between the words and the sight before her. "This is a panic button, it's really simple. You just push this red button the minute you feel he's getting too wild. We'll be standing here with a jacket. If drugs won't settle him, Doc says we have to go for the 'old fashioned' method." The man looked positively gleeful as he held out the canvas contraption resplendent with webbed straps and velcro closures. A long way from the leather straps and metal buckles she'd seen in the old movies, but the effect was the same. Mulder wouldn't be able to move a muscle while they tied him down to a bed and into five or possibly seven point restraints. She shivered, but tried hard not to let the orderly see. He'd more than likely think she was shivering out of fear of what she was about to do, about to encounter. How far from the truth. She was shivering out of fear, but not of her partner. Rather she was afraid _for_ him. If he wasn't insane already, being tied up like a prized Christmas goose would surely go a long way to pushing him over the edge. She had to do everything in her power to avoid that. "Open the door, please," she said, her voice controlled and steady. Taking a deep breath, she waited while the locks clicked back and the metal door hissed as it opened. Mulder stopped dead in his tracks, prepared to lunge. But when he saw who was standing in the doorway, he crumbled to the floor. "Scully . . . oh god, Scully. Thank god, thank god," he sobbed and in an instant she was kneeling next to him, taking him into her arms. "Shh, Mulder. It's all right, it's all right," she murmured softly into his hair as she stroked his head and back. "It's all right now." "It hurts. It hurts so goddamned bad," he moaned, leaning into her. "And they're out to get us. You know that. Skinner, Diana, Spender the older, Krycek, all of them. They are out to get us, Scully and I can hear them, bits and pieces and I was so scared. Krycek went out west . . . he was going to kill . . ." She lost the words in his sobs against her shoulder. "It's all right Mulder. I know, I know all about it." "I was so afraid they wouldn't let you come," he said quietly. Then he looked up to the corner of the room where the security camera sat undisguised against the ceiling. "They're watching us. They watch me all the time. They watched me take a piss in the corner this morning," he grinned at her. "I did it just to make 'em mad." She couldn't hide her return grin. Rage against the machine, Mulder, she thought silently. "Every chance I get," he said aloud. She looked at him confused for a moment. "It's clearing up a little. The noises. I can hear your voice in my head, Scully. Unfortunately, it seems to increase the pain level when it's the clearest." He immediately grabbed his head and rocked, his eyes clenched tight in agony. "Oh, god, Scully, tell me you brought your gun. Just one bullet, right between my eyes," he gasped and doubled over as the pain increased. There was nothing she could do but hold him. She rubbed his back, rubbed his temples. He grabbed her hands and pressed them into his flesh, her knuckles digging into the bone of his skull. "So bad, so bad," he mumbled over and over again, and she could almost feel the pain through her fingers. "Mulder, let me get the doctor. We can use morphine, demoral, something to ease the pain. Please, let them try . . ." He grew wild eyed and threw himself out of her arms. "No! No, Scully! Absolutely not!" He cowered over in a huddled mass, his eyes beseeching her. "That's what they want. They want me senseless. Then I won't be able to hear them thinking. I won't know their plans." He was panting with the sheer effort it took to speak to her. "Please, Scully, no more drugs." She bit her lip. She couldn't drug him when he was so adamant against it. Besides, hadn't the doctor already mentioned that they'd pumped him full of every sedative they could come up with and nothing was making a dent. "My ass hurts from the needles, too, for all the good it did them," he grinned ferally and then monkeyed the same grin for the camera above. She shook her head, annoyed. "Sorry," he said meekly. "I can't help it, really. If I could turn it off, I would. But Scully, I would never . . . well, you know." He blushed slightly and she smiled at him. "Read my mind and tell?" she teased gently. "You know me better than that," he returned seriously. "Oh, and I'm sorry about . . . Diana," he said, turning the two of them away from the camera. "You were right. She's been in on it all along. I'm a big dope, Scully, but all I can say in my defense is that you should have figured that out sometime in the last six years." He chewed on his bottom lip and waited for her response. "What made you change your mind?" she asked, staring at the floor, not trusting herself to look him in the eye. He brought up her face to his level with his index finger. "I don't know what happened. I passed out in a stairwell in the Science Building at AU. I think I saw Krycek, but I can't be sure. The next thing I knew, somebody was dragging me out of a car and into my apartment. When I really woke up, Diana was there. She got me to my bed." Scully's eyes went wide, but she said nothing. "It's not what you think, Scully. I crawled into bed fully clothed, no funny business. Your call woke me up later, whenever that was. After talking to you, I tried to go back to sleep. Diana came in . . . and, well . . ." He seemed to grow more and more uncomfortable. "Mulder, if something happened . . . you don't have to tell me. It's your business." The words were genuine, even if the feeling behind them was weak, at best. He shook his head emphatically no. "Scully, she initiated, I rejected. I swear on every truth I've ever found. And it pissed her off royally!" He closed his eyes briefly. "Scully, she used a stun gun on me." He pulled his hospital gown away from his neck so she could take a look. "And then she drugged me." He showed her a small injection site on his upper left arm. "I was freaking out when I came to. I don't know what she used, but you couldn't have controlled me with a whip and a chair," he said with a deep sigh, the pain and betrayal in his eyes. "She called the EMTs and told them I was violent." He chewed on his lip for a moment. "Must have worn off by now, huh?" "Oh, Mulder," she whispered, touching his cheek. His closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. When he opened his eyes, he appeared pain free. He suddenly pulled her into a hug, whispering into her ear. "We need the rest of the artifact." She mimicked his gesture, burying her face in his shoulder. "Mulder, we have no idea . . ." she whispered in his ear. "The only place we haven't looked is the most obvious, Scully. Back on the Ivory Coast. If part of it washed up on shore, there might be more just under the sand. The rest of it might be there." "Well, it's obvious you aren't going to be going any time soon," she pointed out firmly. "And I refuse to leave you, especially since we aren't sure of our 'friends' and their loyalties." "Now that I've had a chance to talk to you, Scully and the stuff is wearing off, I feel a little safer. Call the boys. Have them come and keep on eye on the hallway. Diana won't try anything in a hospital. Skinner won't try anything if the boys are around, they're too sneaky and he knows it. Then you can take off for the dark continent." He broke their embrace, running his finger down her cheek. "That should give Diana something to chew on," he muttered just under his breath with a wink. "Scared you, did she?" Scully tried hard not break into a wide smile at his actions. "I wasn't _that_ far gone. She tried, I denied. And whatever she used on me, if it was an aphrodisiac, she needs to get her money back." "Hell hath no fury . . ." Scully recited in lowered tones. "Now I at least understand why the sedatives didn't work on you. They were fighting against the drug in your system. Guess it was pretty strong stuff." "Damned straight," he sighed. "Look, tell them you calmed me down. I'm so tired, Scully. I just want to sleep. Get Byers, Frohike and Langly over here, and I can catch a few Zs. And take plenty of sunblock, you know how you burn," he added in a whisper with another finger run down her arm. "Let them give you something for the pain and it's a deal," she countered. At his frown she forged on. "Mulder, I'm worried about you. I want the doctor to do a tox screen and make sure whatever Diana gave you is out of your system. But I don't want to come home to find you've blown an aneurism. You need to rest and to do that, you need to be pain free." He still seemed to be resisting. "Besides, it would go a long way to convincing them that I've managed to tame the 'wild beast'," she added and was relieved to hear his resigned sigh. "Bring it on," he said, none to enthusiastically. He was sitting calmly against the wall when Scully pounded on the door to signal the end of the visit. The orderly stared at the two of them in amazement. Within seconds, Mulder's doctor was at the door. "How did you do that?" he demanded right as Skinner and Diana rounded the corner to join them. "I've always had a way of bringing out the best in him," Scully said coyly, mostly for Diana's benefit. "Well, I really would like to continue with the tests. But he's not had any rest in almost 20 hours. If I could count on him staying calm . . ." "You can," Scully assured him. "He gave me his word. I'd like you to do a tox screen, just in case. And he asked for some pain killer. I suggest demoral, it's a little easier on him." She glanced over to Diana, expecting her to object, but the older woman didn't say a word. This stuff must be hard to detect, Scully mused silently. "Yes, of course," the doctor responded, pulling out his order pad and scribbling the instructions. "And we'll get him in a bed. Now that he's not longer agitated, we can at least get him more comfortable." The orderly still holding the straight jacket looked disappointed that he wouldn't be able to put the item to use. The doctor looked over to him. "Put that somewhere close, in case we need it yet, but get a wheelchair so we can take Agent Mulder to his room. And tell the nurse I need to speak with her about his medication." Mulder calmly sat down in the wheelchair, but reached over to take Scully's hand. Scully lowered her eyes and shifted her gaze to note happily that Diana was doing a slow burn at his actions. They all moved quickly down the hallway. Just a few feet from the door which was his room, Mulder's grip on Scully's hand tightened. She looked down at his face immediately. His face was ashen, his breathing was suddenly labored. As she watched his eyes rolled back in his head and he slumped over, still clutching her hand. "Mulder? Mulder!" she shouted, then put her free hand on the orderly's shoulder to get him to stop. "Doctor, quick!" she said, checking his pulse at his neck. "His pulse is erratic, he's having trouble getting air." She moved away so that the doctor had room. "Get him in the bed," he ordered and the young man hurried to comply. Mulder was wheeled into the room and hoisted into the bed, which was laid flat and raised to it's highest position. The doctor hit the call button and the nurse's voice came over the intercom. The doctor ordered the nurse to come down immediately and assist him. Scully noticed that Skinner and Diana were huddled in the doorway and pushed them both into the hall. "We're in the way. They'll need the room to work," she explained, all the while wanting nothing more than to go back into the room and make sure the doctor was doing things the way she would have. The nurse rushed past with the familiar blue cart equipped with similarly colored machines. Scully knew the significance on sight, but realized the others might not. "He may be having a heart attack," she provided calmly. She wanted to accuse Diana on the spot, but without the evidence, it would serve no purpose. "Oh god!" Diana exclaimed, throwing a hand to her mouth. Skinner just opened his mouth as if to speak and then closed it without saying a word. After several minutes, when it appeared that the activity in the room was not slowing at all, Scully motioned to a bank of chairs in the hallway. "Let's take a seat," she suggested. Wordlessly, the two followed her. When they'd been sitting for a while, Skinner finally turned to Scully. "What's happening? Why is he having these episodes? Is that what caused his . . . attack?" Scully shrugged. "I don't know. We won't know, not until the doctor can do some tests. But if his heart is affected, we'll have to wait a while on some of those." She resumed her examination of the white tiles of the floor. "I need coffee," Diana announced and quickly left the two of them in their seats. "She's a piece of work," Skinner muttered, shaking his head. Scully's expression caught his eyes. "It's not what you think," he told her firmly. "I think you're walking that tightrope again and the wind is coming from the wrong direction," Scully said evenly. "I'm trying to protect you, Scully," Skinner hissed. "Would that protection extend to both Mulder and myself, sir?" Scully shot back, a raised eyebrow the only indication that her question was sarcastic. Skinner let out an exasperated breath and rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "Of course it does." "And Agent Fowley, as well?" Scully continued. "No, and you know it. Fowley has . . . her own interests in this." "Is that why you slipped up and let me know that you've been bugging our office, sir?" Scully asked, lips pursed in scorn. Skinner licked his lips nervously and Scully almost felt sorry for her superior. "I'm under constant surveillance myself, Scully. And I think you remember the consequences for any indiscretion on my part." Scully closed her eyes. "I need to get the other artifact," she said softly. "Then do it." "With Diana watching my every move?" "Let's get Mulder settled. Then just say you're going home to change, take a shower, whatever. I'll handle Fowley." "Playing both sides again, sir?" Scully said, but with a ghost of a twinkle in her eye. "If possible," he responded. "I can only help so much, Scully. But up to that point, I'll do all I can." She nodded. Diana was just coming back when the doctor came out of the room. The doctor walked over to them, Mulder's chart in his hands. "Agent Scully, if I could have a word with you." "Agent Mulder wouldn't mind if AD Skinner heard what you have to say," she told him. He nodded, then sat down on the bank of chairs next to Scully. "He had a 'hiccup'," the doctor said bluntly. Scully sighed in relief, but Diana and Skinner were still looking concerned. "I don't understand. He had the hiccups?" the AD asked. Scully smiled briefly. "No, sir. He had a heart palpitation. Brought on by the extreme doses of barbiturates and his extended period of agitation." She shot a dagger look over to Diana, then turned her attention back to the doctor. "But the fainting worries me." He answered her unasked question. "Exhaustion, I would diagnose. It did serve one useful purpose. He's out like a light. I would guess that the sedatives finally caught up with him. I'm hoping he'll sleep through the night. If that's the case, I plan on starting some of those tests in the morning." "The pain killer?" Scully asked. "I've left an order for demoral. All he has to do is ask. If the dosage is insufficient, the nurses know to reach me immediately and I can change the order." "Thank you, I appreciate that," Scully said with another smile. "Well, I think it would be best if everyone went home and got some rest. The nurse at the desk has your number, Agent Scully, in the event that you're needed. You are his next of kin, am I right?" Scully nodded and took great pleasure in the shocked look that Diana quickly suppressed. The doctor shook hands and left. Scully stood and stretched, Skinner did likewise. "Well, Diana, we might as well call it a night," Skinner said. "Can I give you a ride?" Diana looked like she was going to object, but Scully had already moved toward Mulder's door and stood in the doorway as if claiming her turf. "Thank you for your help, Diana. We'll be fine tonight." It was almost impossible to keep from emphasizing the word 'we'. Diana gave her a sour nod of the head and then turned on her heel and followed Skinner to the elevators. Scully moved into the darkened room, the light from the hallway shining across the bed. He was on oxygen now, but just a cannula. He was sure to pull it off when he woke up in the morning, but it was helping him for the time being. She felt his forehead, touched his neck to check his pulse, not trusting the machine next to his head. It was almost back to normal. She sat on the edge of the bed for a moment, just watching him sleep. Her partner's words over the phone came back to her. What if she found the last fragment? What would it mean to her, personally? Would she have less faith in a God who rode around in spaceships than in one who created the universe out of the mere thoughts in his mind? Did this new possibility really negate her religion, her faith, her view of the universe? She had long balanced the high wire between scientific realities and her faith. Could she add the trick of juggling these new discoveries and still make forward progress, or would this tumble her to the icy abyss below? Scully took Mulder's hand, and brought it up to her lips, pressing a gently kiss on his knuckles. The action was so similar to the kisses he'd given her when she was in the hospital for her cancer. She had to banish the shiver that slid down her back. "I'm about to leave, Mulder. Sleep well, be well. I'll be back as soon as I can. In the meantime, I'll send our three unlikely guardian angels over to keep watch." She leaned over and kissed his forehead, then quietly left the room. As the door closed behind her, Mulder smiled in his sleep. the end Vickie "When you start, you make certain choices, and those choices accumulate and create a number of [other] choices. The story starts to tell itself, and that's been very exciting in a way. There's so much that has come and been told that you are, in a way, a slave to the facts you've created, and it's a really fun way to tell stories. That's not to say it's simplified. In fact, it becomes complicated, but it all starts to make sense, and that's been a really wonderful thing." Quote from Chris Carter on development of The X Files